common machinist terms explained

Cody1771

Explorer
Here a some common machinist terms explained


Machine - A mechanical device for the removal of redundant parts of the operator's anatomy. It is fitted with various lethal weapons, known as tools.

Machinist - A person suffering from the delusion that they control the above machine. Chiefly employed in exhibiting grossly inflated wage packets to non-engineering friends.

Tool Setter - An interesting animal kept by the management and trained to replace broken tools, etc. Is very docile when deprived of sleep.

Q.A. Inspector - A survivor of the Spanish Inquisition. His chief function is to weaken the machinist's nerve, thus rendering him easy prey to the machine. This is done by informing him that certain dimensions are oversize and, after adjustment, are then undersize by the same amount.

Estimator - An illiterate whose mental processes cannot assimilate the fact that there are only 60 minutes in an hour.

Tool-grinder - Someone who can grind a cutting edge on a tool and leave it in exactly the same state as before.

Reamer - A device for producing various patterns on a bore surface.

Tap - like a reamer but much more brittle

Test Gauge - An instrument made of metal which has the peculiar property of momentary expansion or contraction

Chargehand - Strict caution to be taken with this individual. From his frequent inquiries as to the number of hours you have worked, it must be assumed he is connected to the Income Tax authorities

Laborer - This specimen has no ambition, does nothing all day and stays on overtime to finish it. Always missing when wanted. Very obliging a week before Christmas.

Foreman - Very rarely seen except when you pick up a newspaper or fill in your football coupon

Wagepacket - delayed action bombshell

Bonus - Latin name for carrot

Scrap - See Swarf

Swarf - Chief product of engineering

Component - By-product of the manufacture of the above

Finish - An abstract term used by the Q.A. Inspector and something that is never good enough

Bolt - A cylindrical piece of metal with a helical screw on the outside that is either under or oversize

Nut - Something that never fits the above

Location diameter - A size that is never right and is always produced by another department

Faulty set-up - An accomplishment always achieved by the opposite shift

Model - A standard of excellence produced accidentally

Coolant pump - A device so designed as to deluge the machinist with oil or water when he is not looking
 

RHINO

Expedition Leader
i protest !! everybody knows a swarf is when lieutenant warf sneezes on star trek
 

blueeyeddevil

Observer
That is awesome! Just have to add:
Blueprint- Often missing until day after project is complete.
Usually written on a Jack-in-the-box napkin.
If drawn up by an outside source (engineer), best advice is to take to bathroom and "stash" just in case.
 

spencyg

This Space For Rent
Here a some common machinist terms explained


Machine - A mechanical device for the removal of redundant parts of the operator's anatomy. It is fitted with various lethal weapons, known as tools.

Machinist - A person suffering from the delusion that they control the above machine. Chiefly employed in exhibiting grossly inflated wage packets to non-engineering friends.

Tool Setter - An interesting animal kept by the management and trained to replace broken tools, etc. Is very docile when deprived of sleep.

Q.A. Inspector - A survivor of the Spanish Inquisition. His chief function is to weaken the machinist's nerve, thus rendering him easy prey to the machine. This is done by informing him that certain dimensions are oversize and, after adjustment, are then undersize by the same amount.

Estimator - An illiterate whose mental processes cannot assimilate the fact that there are only 60 minutes in an hour.

Tool-grinder - Someone who can grind a cutting edge on a tool and leave it in exactly the same state as before.

Reamer - A device for producing various patterns on a bore surface.

Tap - like a reamer but much more brittle

Test Gauge - An instrument made of metal which has the peculiar property of momentary expansion or contraction

Chargehand - Strict caution to be taken with this individual. From his frequent inquiries as to the number of hours you have worked, it must be assumed he is connected to the Income Tax authorities

Laborer - This specimen has no ambition, does nothing all day and stays on overtime to finish it. Always missing when wanted. Very obliging a week before Christmas.

Foreman - Very rarely seen except when you pick up a newspaper or fill in your football coupon

Wagepacket - delayed action bombshell

Bonus - Latin name for carrot

Scrap - See Swarf

Swarf - Chief product of engineering

Component - By-product of the manufacture of the above

Finish - An abstract term used by the Q.A. Inspector and something that is never good enough

Bolt - A cylindrical piece of metal with a helical screw on the outside that is either under or oversize

Nut - Something that never fits the above

Location diameter - A size that is never right and is always produced by another department

Faulty set-up - An accomplishment always achieved by the opposite shift

Model - A standard of excellence produced accidentally

Coolant pump - A device so designed as to deluge the machinist with oil or water when he is not looking


Coolant - A type of cologne worn by machinists

Digital Caliper - A tool for testing dead batteries
 

DasZuk

New member
I'm not a machinist, but am also the victim of implementing concepts designed by teams of engineers
(That refuse to talk to each other and discover their components actually bolt to each other in very confined spaces)

I'll add my 2 cents -

"Kit" - requires parts not included or indicated in drawings - some assembly required.

- Repairs conducted by a field service technician -
"Repair parts fabricated in the field - hammered to fit - painted to match"
 

I Leak Oil

Expedition Leader
Some of those are good!
I once placed an ad looking for a toolmaker. One guy came in and told me he had plenty of experience assembling locking pliers for Stanley.....I had to tell him he was the wrong kind of toolmaker.
Oh, and let me tell you. When you place an ad looking for production welders....Be prepared, everyone who comes through the door can weld (in their own mind).
 

inked33

Adventurer
Oh, and let me tell you. When you place an ad looking for production welders....Be prepared, everyone who comes through the door can weld (in their own mind).

ive been a certified welder for a long time and the foreman of a couple welding departments now. ive interviewed guys who were nothing more then comic relief. i actually get a kick out of guys who come in and cant even set the welder, one guy actually had to ask me how to turn it on......lol
 

Cody1771

Explorer
more from the guys at 4btswaps.com



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Other common tools defined:


DRILL PRESS:
A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, denting the freshly-painted vertical stabilizer which you had carefully set in the corner where nothing could get to it.

WIRE WHEEL:
Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench at the speed of light . Also removes fingerprints and hard-earned cleco calluses from fingers in about the time it takes you to say, "Oh ********!"

ELECTRIC HAND DRILL:
Normally used for spinning pop rivets in their holes until you die of old age.

SKILL SAW:
A portable cutting tool used to make studs too short.

PLIERS:
Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of blood-blisters.

BELT SANDER:
An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs.

HACKSAW:
One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle. It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.

VISE-GRIPS:
Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.

WELDING GLOVES:
Heavy duty leather gloves used to prolong the conduction of intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.

OXYACETYLENE TORCH:
Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable objects in your shop on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside the wheel hub you want the bearing race out of.

TABLE SAW:
A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood projectiles for testing wall integrity.

HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK:
Used for lowering an automobile to the ground after you have installed your new brake shoes, trapping the jack handle firmly under the bumper.

EIGHT-FOOT LONG YELLOW PINE 2X4:
Used for levering an automobile upward off of a trapped hydraulic jack handle.

E-Z OUT BOLT AND STUD EXTRACTOR:
A tool ten times harder than any known drill bit that snaps neatly off in bolt holes thereby ending any possible future use.

BAND SAW:
A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to cut good aluminum sheet into smaller pieces that more easily fit into the trash can after you cut on the inside of the line instead of the outside edge.

TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST:
A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength of everything you forgot to disconnect.

CRAFTSMAN 1/2 x 24-INCH SCREWDRIVER:
A very large pry bar that inexplicably has an accurately machined screwdriver tip on the end opposite the handle.

AVIATION METAL SNIPS:
See hacksaw.

PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER:
Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under lids and for opening old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil on your shirt; but can also be used, as the name implies, to strip out Phillips screw heads.

STRAIGHT SCREWDRIVER:
A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to convert common slotted screws into non-removable screws.

PRY BAR:
A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.

HOSE CUTTER:
A tool used to make hoses too short.

HAMMER:
Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts adjacent the object we are trying to hit.

MECHANIC'S KNIFE:
Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on contents such as seats, vinyl records, liquids in plastic bottles, collector magazines, refund checks, and rubber or plastic parts. Especially useful for slicing work clothes, but only while in use.

DAMMIT TOOL:
Any handy tool that you grab and throw across the garage while yelling "DAMMIT" at the top of your lungs. It is also, most often, the next tool that you will need.


tape measure/ a tool that is used to confirm you cut on the wrong side of the line/ see bandsaw above

sledgehammer/ a tool that is used to make anything fit anywhere

sawzall/ a tool to make sure you have to repaint anything within 12 inches of that dammmm line

drillpress vice/ a tool that you trip on while trying to dodge a piece of flying flatstock

jackstand/ something you should have used before the Oring in your floor jack gave out

floor jack// a tool that won't quite lift high enough to place jackstands safely under frame

impact wrench/ a tool to sheer off bolts in the quickest manner possible

cheater bar/ a tool to sheer off bolts and smash nuckels at same time,, so you can say you are multi-tasking

when all else fails remember to use the detroit torqueing tips/ tighten it till it strips then back it off a quarter

chisel/ any screwdriver that is reach

center-punch/ makes the mark where you realy "WANTED' the hole to be

angle grinder/ to also find all the flammables laying around

pockets/ the place to catch all the excess slag while welding overhead

ZZTop beard/ something that should be tucked into your shirt before welding overhead;;;;;;;;;;burning hair stinkkks

the best for last/
JBWELD/ when you want something that is truely affected by the gravitational pull of the moon,, try this stuff, it is gaurenteed to hold everything but what you are trying to hold together

BEER/ the most used "tool" that will fix anything,,, till the morning

tool-box-refigerator-a.jpg


tool-box-refigerator-aa.jpg
 

I Leak Oil

Expedition Leader
ive been a certified welder for a long time and the foreman of a couple welding departments now. ive interviewed guys who were nothing more then comic relief. i actually get a kick out of guys who come in and cant even set the welder, one guy actually had to ask me how to turn it on......lol

I had one come in for a test. He let about 3 feet of mig wire out, then tried to weld. Holding it in one had he kept jabbing at the work piece. He couldn't understand why I didn't think he would be a good fit for the company.:Wow1:
Every time I'm sad I think of this and it makes me laugh....
 

I Leak Oil

Expedition Leader
more from the guys at 4btswaps.com



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Other common tools defined:


DRILL PRESS:
A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, denting the freshly-painted vertical stabilizer which you had carefully set in the corner where nothing could get to it.

WIRE WHEEL:
Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench at the speed of light . Also removes fingerprints and hard-earned cleco calluses from fingers in about the time it takes you to say, "Oh ********!"

ELECTRIC HAND DRILL:
Normally used for spinning pop rivets in their holes until you die of old age.

SKILL SAW:
A portable cutting tool used to make studs too short.

PLIERS:
Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of blood-blisters.

BELT SANDER:
An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs.

HACKSAW:
One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle. It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.

VISE-GRIPS:
Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.

WELDING GLOVES:
Heavy duty leather gloves used to prolong the conduction of intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.

OXYACETYLENE TORCH:
Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable objects in your shop on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside the wheel hub you want the bearing race out of.

TABLE SAW:
A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood projectiles for testing wall integrity.

HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK:
Used for lowering an automobile to the ground after you have installed your new brake shoes, trapping the jack handle firmly under the bumper.

EIGHT-FOOT LONG YELLOW PINE 2X4:
Used for levering an automobile upward off of a trapped hydraulic jack handle.

E-Z OUT BOLT AND STUD EXTRACTOR:
A tool ten times harder than any known drill bit that snaps neatly off in bolt holes thereby ending any possible future use.

BAND SAW:
A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to cut good aluminum sheet into smaller pieces that more easily fit into the trash can after you cut on the inside of the line instead of the outside edge.

TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST:
A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength of everything you forgot to disconnect.

CRAFTSMAN 1/2 x 24-INCH SCREWDRIVER:
A very large pry bar that inexplicably has an accurately machined screwdriver tip on the end opposite the handle.

AVIATION METAL SNIPS:
See hacksaw.

PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER:
Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under lids and for opening old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil on your shirt; but can also be used, as the name implies, to strip out Phillips screw heads.

STRAIGHT SCREWDRIVER:
A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to convert common slotted screws into non-removable screws.

PRY BAR:
A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.

HOSE CUTTER:
A tool used to make hoses too short.

HAMMER:
Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts adjacent the object we are trying to hit.

MECHANIC'S KNIFE:
Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on contents such as seats, vinyl records, liquids in plastic bottles, collector magazines, refund checks, and rubber or plastic parts. Especially useful for slicing work clothes, but only while in use.

DAMMIT TOOL:
Any handy tool that you grab and throw across the garage while yelling "DAMMIT" at the top of your lungs. It is also, most often, the next tool that you will need.


tape measure/ a tool that is used to confirm you cut on the wrong side of the line/ see bandsaw above

sledgehammer/ a tool that is used to make anything fit anywhere

sawzall/ a tool to make sure you have to repaint anything within 12 inches of that dammmm line

drillpress vice/ a tool that you trip on while trying to dodge a piece of flying flatstock

jackstand/ something you should have used before the Oring in your floor jack gave out

floor jack// a tool that won't quite lift high enough to place jackstands safely under frame

impact wrench/ a tool to sheer off bolts in the quickest manner possible

cheater bar/ a tool to sheer off bolts and smash nuckels at same time,, so you can say you are multi-tasking

when all else fails remember to use the detroit torqueing tips/ tighten it till it strips then back it off a quarter

chisel/ any screwdriver that is reach

center-punch/ makes the mark where you realy "WANTED' the hole to be

angle grinder/ to also find all the flammables laying around

pockets/ the place to catch all the excess slag while welding overhead

ZZTop beard/ something that should be tucked into your shirt before welding overhead;;;;;;;;;;burning hair stinkkks

the best for last/
JBWELD/ when you want something that is truely affected by the gravitational pull of the moon,, try this stuff, it is gaurenteed to hold everything but what you are trying to hold together

BEER/ the most used "tool" that will fix anything,,, till the morning


Ah yes, no matter what part of the world you're from or what language you speak there are some things that all man kind experience!
 

inked33

Adventurer
I had one come in for a test. He let about 3 feet of mig wire out, then tried to weld. Holding it in one had he kept jabbing at the work piece. He couldn't understand why I didn't think he would be a good fit for the company.:Wow1:
Every time I'm sad I think of this and it makes me laugh....

lol......ive heard of people doing that but never actually seen it myself. it just amazes me how alot of people think welding isnt really a skilled trade. theres a big difference between running a few welds in your driveway and actually being a professional welder
 

inked33

Adventurer
more from the guys at 4btswaps.com



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Other common tools defined:


DRILL PRESS:
A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, denting the freshly-painted vertical stabilizer which you had carefully set in the corner where nothing could get to it.

WIRE WHEEL:
Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench at the speed of light . Also removes fingerprints and hard-earned cleco calluses from fingers in about the time it takes you to say, "Oh ********!"

ELECTRIC HAND DRILL:
Normally used for spinning pop rivets in their holes until you die of old age.

SKILL SAW:
A portable cutting tool used to make studs too short.

PLIERS:
Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of blood-blisters.

BELT SANDER:
An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs.

HACKSAW:
One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle. It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.

VISE-GRIPS:
Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.

WELDING GLOVES:
Heavy duty leather gloves used to prolong the conduction of intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.

OXYACETYLENE TORCH:
Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable objects in your shop on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside the wheel hub you want the bearing race out of.

TABLE SAW:
A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood projectiles for testing wall integrity.

HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK:
Used for lowering an automobile to the ground after you have installed your new brake shoes, trapping the jack handle firmly under the bumper.

EIGHT-FOOT LONG YELLOW PINE 2X4:
Used for levering an automobile upward off of a trapped hydraulic jack handle.

E-Z OUT BOLT AND STUD EXTRACTOR:
A tool ten times harder than any known drill bit that snaps neatly off in bolt holes thereby ending any possible future use.

BAND SAW:
A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to cut good aluminum sheet into smaller pieces that more easily fit into the trash can after you cut on the inside of the line instead of the outside edge.

TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST:
A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength of everything you forgot to disconnect.

CRAFTSMAN 1/2 x 24-INCH SCREWDRIVER:
A very large pry bar that inexplicably has an accurately machined screwdriver tip on the end opposite the handle.

AVIATION METAL SNIPS:
See hacksaw.

PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER:
Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under lids and for opening old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil on your shirt; but can also be used, as the name implies, to strip out Phillips screw heads.

STRAIGHT SCREWDRIVER:
A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to convert common slotted screws into non-removable screws.

PRY BAR:
A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.

HOSE CUTTER:
A tool used to make hoses too short.

HAMMER:
Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts adjacent the object we are trying to hit.

MECHANIC'S KNIFE:
Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on contents such as seats, vinyl records, liquids in plastic bottles, collector magazines, refund checks, and rubber or plastic parts. Especially useful for slicing work clothes, but only while in use.

DAMMIT TOOL:
Any handy tool that you grab and throw across the garage while yelling "DAMMIT" at the top of your lungs. It is also, most often, the next tool that you will need.


tape measure/ a tool that is used to confirm you cut on the wrong side of the line/ see bandsaw above

sledgehammer/ a tool that is used to make anything fit anywhere

sawzall/ a tool to make sure you have to repaint anything within 12 inches of that dammmm line

drillpress vice/ a tool that you trip on while trying to dodge a piece of flying flatstock

jackstand/ something you should have used before the Oring in your floor jack gave out

floor jack// a tool that won't quite lift high enough to place jackstands safely under frame

impact wrench/ a tool to sheer off bolts in the quickest manner possible

cheater bar/ a tool to sheer off bolts and smash nuckels at same time,, so you can say you are multi-tasking

when all else fails remember to use the detroit torqueing tips/ tighten it till it strips then back it off a quarter

chisel/ any screwdriver that is reach

center-punch/ makes the mark where you realy "WANTED' the hole to be

angle grinder/ to also find all the flammables laying around

pockets/ the place to catch all the excess slag while welding overhead

ZZTop beard/ something that should be tucked into your shirt before welding overhead;;;;;;;;;;burning hair stinkkks

the best for last/
JBWELD/ when you want something that is truely affected by the gravitational pull of the moon,, try this stuff, it is gaurenteed to hold everything but what you are trying to hold together

BEER/ the most used "tool" that will fix anything,,, till the morning

tool-box-refigerator-a.jpg


tool-box-refigerator-aa.jpg

these are great....needed a good laugh today thanks
 

chasespeed

Explorer
lol......ive heard of people doing that but never actually seen it myself. it just amazes me how alot of people think welding isnt really a skilled trade. theres a big difference between running a few welds in your driveway and actually being a professional welder

You know, I will agree with this....

I use a mill and lathe as a hobby.... made some cool stuff..... usually one off stuff for bikes.... does that make me a machinist? Uh, NOPE....

I weld for... me, and a few buddies, as it is right now, I am sans a MIG and TIG, but, have access to a good ole reliable Lincoln Stick that I learned on as a kid.....

I can weld... but, does that make me a welder... NOPE...

Would I be comfortable taking the class to become a "Certified Welder"... yeah..... does it matter enough to me... well... been thinking about it....would certainly open some more doors for me... but, the time invested.. I dont have...

I guess every industry has those....."I can do it"........

Chase
 

blueeyeddevil

Observer
As a Shop Manager/Foreman I too have seen the "welder". I have a basic set of tests. First, turn on the welder and read a tape measure.
1) Oh, hi your here to apply for a job? O.K. Go set up that machine over there.(the one that looks like hell, but will make $$ all day long) Now,make me a 10" O.D. square out of 1"x1". Mitered ends,easy right?

Man oh Man!!! Have I seen some crazy ****!
The Mysterious Red-Hot Whip Welder, with 2-3' of .035 hanging out of the end.
The "Machine is broken" welder that doesn't realize that the ground clamp is still on the machine.
The " I don't need no stinking shielding gas" welders. Ah, no buddy. That's not flux-core wire in that machine.

The ability to properly read a BASIC (1/16ths) tape measure is a rare "talent" these days.
I've received everything from 9"x11" , 10 x/y" x 10 a/b" ,all kinds of sizes EXCEPT 10"x10" ! One guy gave me a 12"x8" rectangle because the pieces were already cut.

There truly is a shortage of qualified, not necessarily certified, competent welders. There is no shame in being a craftsman.
 

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