There are a ton of "rules of thumb". All of them some variation, or special case of these basic rules:
1: Use only gear/equipment that is made for, rated for, and ready for the job at hand. If a strap, cable, anchor point, or anything else in the picture is damaged or questionable, don't use it.
2: Use as little energy as required. Wether using a winch, or another vehicle to pull, more is not always better. Slow and steady, increasing force as needed. The more energy you have stored in the system, the more potential damage it can cause if something goes wrong.
3: Eliminate missile hazards. No hooks on straps. place a heavy jacket or blanket over cables to help absorb the energy when/if they snap. Anything that can come off, assume it will. If it is questionable, don't use it.
4: Maintain a clear path for the strap/cable to "snap back" into. If you are looking down the length of a cable or strap that has tension on it, you are in danger of being killed. You should be a minimum of 15 degrees off to the side of the strap/cable, relative to the direction of force, as measured from each attachement point. If you are inside of a vehicle which is inside this danger zone (such as you are being pulled out of a mud hole), put everything you can between you and the cable. Leave your hood open if the cable or strap is attached to the front of your vehicle. Place cargo behind you if the strap is attached to the rear of your vehicle...better to have a strap break and destroy your hood or some cargo, rather than have that strap destroy your head.
5: Communication. Everyone involved with the recovery needs to be able to communicate. Everyone else needs to step back and stay out of the way. One person is in charge....he/she makes all the calls. No second guessing...so pick that person with care. The exception here is if someone sees something unsafe. If anyone starts yelling "stop", then stop.
One last thing. All recoveries have the potential to go very wrong, and people get killed. It is usually a combination of things that cause an accident. If you remove one of those contributing factors, the accident is avoided. So you remove as many "possible problems" as possible. Then you accept that things still may go wrong, then you proceed as you see fit.