The Elephant Chronicles

[Phoo]

It's out. Finally. After approximately five hours worth of work, one beer and pizza break, and one diversion to put together a rather screwball, three foot long assemblage of extension bars and swivels that can only be described as "hoopdee", the engine has been wrestled from its former home. A big thanks goes to a very good buddy for helping to make this happen. Finding the hardware to transfer the beast from lift to stand was another small project, but that's done now too.



I'm sure this would be easy work for better mechanics than I, but I am pleased by this little victory. A good bit of work came before this day, but in a way, I feel like I'm just getting moving on the project. In the months (there have been more than a few) since I bought this thing, I've been dogged by distractions, including a rather glorious winter, a major shoulder injury, outrageous work commitments, and some other equally lame excuses.
The date is August 22, 2015.

More to come later. It is a beautiful, warm, fall day, and I need to go play outside for a bit.

 

[Phoo]

Well, I reckon I should make a couple of introductions at this point. There are two main characters in this story, though a few others may pop in and out as needed.
First up, Phoo:
That's me. Obviously (or perhaps not) that isn't my real name, but an abbreviation... of a nickname given to me by a childhood friend. I'm just your average, ordinary, outdoorsy, closet gearhead. I enjoy riding bikes, riding snow, sleeping outside, poopin' in the woods and howlin' at the moon. I'm also just a touch social media phobic, and normally keep a pretty low profile in the electronic universe. For whatever reason, I figured I would take off the tin foil hat for a bit, and this seems like a good place to share some words and pictures with likeminded folk.



Next, The Elephant:
It's big. It's grey. It's a bit of a beast. Sadly, it is also currently immobile, but in 1987, it was one of Land Rover's finest. Behold -



Aside from getting it into reliable (insert Rover reliability joke here), roadworthy shape, the finished product will be equal parts cargo van, micro-RV and rally car. This concept deserves better explanation, but that too shall wait for another day and another post. I suspect it will do none of these tasks with great proficiency, but I intend to give it my best and enjoy myself in the process.

As previously noted, I'm already about waist deep in this mess. I'll keep posting updates, though perhaps a bit out of chronological order, and hopefully some day, I will catch up to the present.
I'm quite certain I'll have plenty of idiotic questions along the way, and hopefully someone out there can learn from my mistakes.

-Phoo

 

[Phoo]

With every crusty old vehicle I've had the privilege to work on, it is the interior work that is the least satisfying. A good day of engine or drive-train work ends with the pleasing scent of Gojo hand cleaner and a functioning vehicle. Provided bolts are not rounded or snapped, things sort of go together in a semi-precise manner. Not to many surprises, usually. My experiences with the interiors, particularly dash panels, often involve muted swearing and a few broken plastic tabs. Things sort of fit together at the end, and I'm just glad to be done with the ordeal.
In the case of the Elephant, there's a good bit to be done, and fortunately, someone has already taken the liberty of crunching a few of the geriatric plastic bits in the cockpit. This winter, I'll be fabbing some custom parts for sure. Today's adventure, however, was the headliner. The speakers, rear view mirror, ceiling lights and "oh ******* handles" all came down easily enough. The liner itself held an interesting surprise for me. Here's the beast, post extraction:



And my now bare ceiling:



You can't really tell from the photos, but it looks like a family of mice had taken up temporary residence between the liner and the roof. All sorts of shredded paper and foam came down with the liner. The little buggers had also chewed partway through the insulation on the right side speaker cable and wiper motor wire before deciding that the taste of plastic was unpalatable. Fortunately, I did not find any droppings or dead mouse carcasses... yet.

So, here's the view from the front seats, with the back end stripped down:



With all of that mess out of there, I can now start thinking about what to do with all of that glorious space!

In a later episode of course...

 

[Kgh]

Good luck with the project!

 

[Phoo]

That's great, It starts with an earthquake, birds and snakes,
An aeroplane - Lenny Bruce is not afraid

Let us hope that this project is not the end of me (or the world as we know it)... The date stamp on my last post would indicate that I'm failing at this social media thing. I'll try to make up for it with volume of content. This one could run long. Let's try an origin story...




More accurately, I believe it started approximately 13 months ago with an email from a buddy, containing a link to a sale advertisement. "Hey, I think I found your new project rig".

Then again, it would be folly not to mention the time I convinced my college roommate to co-drive for me while I chased the Finger Lakes Region SCCA winter rally calendar, solidifying a passion for unpaved roads in the middle of nowhere.

But then, there's also the time in kindergarten when we had to give an oral presentation on someone whom we admired; a hero of sorts. Clad in some kind of goofy jumpsuit and a toy full-face helmet (visor up, of course), to a speechless group of five and six year olds, I delivered a short biography of Mario Andretti.

I should also note that my 2.75 year old nephew, without any adult encouragement, can identify, on sight, all major vehicle makes (Mommy drives a Volkswagen. Daddy drives a Mazda). He also enjoys riding the public bus for fun. Perhaps a combination of genetics and destiny are at play as well.



So anyhow, about a month and a half after CR informed me "Hey, I think I found your new project rig", an auto-hauler piloted by an impatient but well meaning man with a heavy eastern European accent, parked itself a block away from my apartment, adjacent to a busy road, and at the bottom of a hill. Perfect.

In addition to being a stand-up dude, CR is approximately neck deep in his own project; a Cummins powered Rover (SIIA). If you are clever with the interwebs, you can find his madness on a certain other website.

Apparently, the power lines were too low for his liking (I think he could have made it), so after gruffly informing me that "This is going to require a lot of work. It's going to cost you a lot of money", he unloaded the beast in the midst of traffic and chaos, then motored away. I had convinced myself that I'd need the assistance of the tow company down the street to get it into my driveway, but CR was sure that the Dethwagen could handle it.

"Dethwagen" is a gloriously appropriate nickname granted to CR's grumpy, grumbly, snarly V70 wagon.

Like the well equipped wannabe-overlanders that we are, a hasty, urban, vehicle recovery setup was rigged, and the unplated, derelict Rover dragged up the hill and into the driveway.

Before tossing a cover over the beast, we took some more time to thoroughly examine everything in greater detail. I had known from the beginning that this would be an ambitious project (by my low standards), but it wasn't until then that the gravity of my impulse decision set in.

CR - "Mostly a bunch of piddly *******. Shouldn't be too bad."

Thanks bud!

 

[Phoo]

Regardless of what this madness may look like from the outside, it's not meant to be a perpetual and open ended project. As I go along, I try to set reasonable goals for myself. Otherwise, nothing gets done. I need that dangling carrot to lure me out into the unheated garage to freeze my fingers off for a couple hours after work. For the end of 2015, I had two main goals. Unfortunately, I only managed to complete one "on time" (no one is keeping schedule except for the voices in my head). The first was to get the interior stripped and into my nice warm basement to be rehabbed while winter rages on. I'm happy to report that the rear bench now serves duty as an auxiliary couch in my crappy apartment and the entire dash (minus the steering wheel) made it safely indoors. The front seats still stand lonesome in the truck, but they might get jettisoned altogether, depending on funds.
All of the afore mentioned plastic bits lined up for a nice family portrait:



If you're hip to RRC cockpit layout, you'll notice that the piece responsible for holding the radio, diff-lock indicator and cigarette lighter are missing. Just one of many parts that I need to source. I've successfully managed to patch a handful of little cracks here and there with some plastic epoxy, but let me introduce you to Public Enemy Number One -



That's the dashboard vent panel, if you don't recognize it outside of its home.
I recall reading a front page article (here on ExPo, of course) once upon a time, regarding the 10 commandments of vehicle modification, or some such business. Modding your truck with bits found at Home Depot made the list of thou shall nots. And so, if you are the rule abiding type (or maybe just have better taste than I), please avert your eyes!

Broken Vent Panel, meet Plastic 4' Gutter Cover -



I got it at Lowes, so maybe I'm off the hook. I suppose that's enough verbal spew. Onto the repair.

The Mockup -



The Fabrication -



The Trial Fit -



The (almost) Finished Product -



It sho' ain't purty, but with some paint, it'll do just fine until some astute passenger looks a bit too hard and calls me out for using rain gutter pieces to build a truck.

In other news, this little guy came out of his hole, just a couple of days ago -


"Who, that little guy? I wouldn't worry about that little guy" - Arcot Ramathorn

And that minor bit of surgery closes out goal #2, which is/was to have the entire engine torn down to be sent out for some machine-shop lovin', hopefully coming back to me in time for an early spring rebuild.

 

[99Discovery]

Excellent repair/resto. I love the raingutter repair for the interior compartments. If you paint it will work well.

 

[sydneyman]

not sure why i hadnt seen this thread before. Really enjoying your storytelling. lol. Also, any idea where your rack came from? Im looking for something similar for my LWB. Thanks and i look forward to more updates!

 

[Phoo]

Thanks! I'm glad you enjoy my mindless ramblings. I'm trying to get this done in a reasonable amount of time, and at a "reasonable cost" (bahahaha!) without being a total redneck about it... not that there is anything wrong with that either, in proper context.

The roof rack is made by Garvin and came with the vehicle. I believe it is this one here:
http://www.wildernessracks.com/index.php/off-road-series-rack-84-95-range-rover-84-l.htm

I'm not 100% certain whether or not I'll keep it, and I intend to paint the beast this summer, so I removed the rack a couple months ago. I don't have any other experiences with such a rack, but I was quite shocked by how heavy it was. It's a sturdy, well made piece of equipment for sure, but it's enough to eat into your payload, change your CG and alter ride height. I really like the thought of tossing a sheet of cardboard up there and sleeping under the stars, but that remains to be seen...

 

[sydneyman]

Well if you decide to sell, let me know! Ive got an aluminum half rack but would rather have the full length. Im assuming your in Connecticut based on your nutmeg location?

and thanks for the link!

 

[Phoo]

One of the perks of living alone as a shameless, scumbag bachelor is never having to say -

"Sorry about that engine block I left on the living room floor (right next to the unicycle of course)!"



On the whole, I'm a fairly neat and tidy sort of person, but things tend to get a bit chaotic in the heat of battle. There is however, a reason for this mess. No, I did not want a new (also greasy and heavy) coffee table, but simply needed the old lump to warm up to room temperature prior to taking accurate bore measurements.

So after some awkward poking and prodding with various implements, the verdict is...

Yup, it's gonna need some work. Probably gonna cost some money.
Darn tow driver.

 

[Phoo]

Looking back at the history of my own posts in this thread, two things are immediately evident:
1) I am entirely incapable of holding myself to rigor of regular, electronic updates
2) I use a fantastic number of words to describe what appears to be a rather small amount of work

So, back from the land of lost and forgotten build threads... This particular story "ends" (those quotes are there for a reason, just sit tight, now) with a bit of a twist, so let's get back into it. And I shall begin with one of the worst photos I've taken. Behold:



I call it - Nondescript Truck Parts Lost in Grassy Field.
The first person to identify all of them wins a cookie. More importantly, they represent some of the first FINISHED parts of this project. Forcibly removed from their respective homes, attacked with wire brushes, doused in various caustic solutions, and properly coated with a layer of thick black goop to keep them from acting up again. Like good ol' medieval torture.

As should be obvious at this point, those parts are the direct result of an engine rebuild.
Clearly, when one has the engine out for a rebuild, rusty footwells should also be addressed. It's so much more convenient with an open engine bay.
And since you've gone ahead and hacked out a large chunk of your front footweels with an angle grinder, it's only proper to hit the frame rails with a fresh coat of POR-15 (or rust inhibitor of choice), as you'll not see them again for some time once the truck is back together.
But really friends, as long as the front flooring is out, and all easily accessible chassis members are being refinished, it just wouldn't be right to neglect the back half of the truck. So please, out with the floor and that bothersome fuel tank already.

This is all entirely reasonable and logical, and I'm sure that I'm just preaching to the choir of wise and knowing Rover Illuminati, so let's get on with another picture (for is a post without pictures truly a post?):



In conclusion, stuff got painted, then I put it back together.

I'm actually a bit fond of this next photo:



I'll reveal its identity later, but that monster also saw a substantial refurb.
As per usual, this post has grown wordy and silly, so I'll get back at it tomorrow.
Maybe...

 

[Phoo]

And so it ends as it began, with an inoperative Landy under an ill fitting cover:



In full disclosure, that's not a current picture, but the scene similar. The truck has been moved to a storage lot, where every month, I send a check to a man, who points hi-res cameras at it in hopes that thieving Rover-Bandits don't abduct it in the night. There it shall sit, sad and lonely for about a year, perhaps a little longer. Life circumstances suggested that I get out and take an extended stroll while the opportunity is present, so this little project gets shoved to the way-back burner.
For my own bragging rights, as well as self accountability, here's a rundown of what was accomplished and what is left -

The Good:
Engine removed, stripped and block reworked
All required engine internals procured
HVAC mixer box (that modern art looking thing in my last post) refurbished with new foam seals and new heater core
All available dash pieces removed, repaired and repainted
Rusted metal removed from front footweels
Rear flooring removed, all bracing wire brushed, repainted, reinstalled
95% of chassis cleaned and repainted

The Bad:
I did a lousy job of documenting all of the above
Engine awaiting reassembly
T-case needs re-sealing or replacing
Misc. driveline seals to be replaced
Thorough electrical checkout needed prior to full vehicle reassembly
I'm going to kill the sunroof

The Ugly:
I'll likely not be moving back to the Land of Nutmeg, and moving all of this junk is gonna suck pretty hard
I wish I had been able to get my junk together for this upcoming trip

So, I've taken to heart the many things that the "ExPo" world has taught me, rid myself of a great many material things, said some goodbyes, and am slowly attempting to get the F outta Dodge. I'll be blasting off into space just as soon as some administrative details clear in the next week or so, and will be starting an appropriate thread elsewhere on this fine forum.

I'll keep it a surprise for now, but the new sled has 266 HP, all wheel drive, space to sleep, and is the definitive Anti-Rover.

Stay tuned...