Man
@jgallo1 you're harder to keep up than myself when it comes to deciding on your next vehicle lol.
Of those that you listed, here are my thoughts. There's no way I'd recommend you get an XtraCab (extended), you'll want/need four full doors with your crew. No to the 1st Gen Tacoma, period. 1st Gen Tundra's look the part and are a great size but the frames are a major issue and like the 1st Gen Tacoma, they are hard to find in good condition with acceptable miles and not overpriced. The 2nd Gen Tundra is a great platform but there's no better fuel economy than you PW, less power, no lockers, no straight axle, and a shorter bed. I don't see what you're gaining in going to a 2nd Gen Tundra from your PW, it's just as wide and lacks everything I just mentioned, it's only benefit is the shorter wheelbase. If you're trying to lose some girth and overall size then I would suggest a midsize.
If I were you I'd be looking for a 2nd Gen double cab Tacoma or possibly the new Ford Ranger. I know if I hard to start over right now and there were no need for a full-size truck in my life, I'd head straight to the Ford dealer and pick out a new Ranger. The new Frontier looks promising on paper but until it hits who knows and coming from family that had quite a few Nissans/Infinitis in the past I can confidently say that they aren't as reliable as a Toyota and they definitely lack in the fit and finish in comparison. I really wish we could get the Isuzu D-Max over here.