Maybe you don't know what the Rubicon trail is like, but it is not for the weak and it is not for any stock or even lightly modified vehicle.
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Any newbie can do the Rubicon in a new stock SUV. Just go out and get a new BMW /FORD/RANGE ROVER SUV with traction control, push the Rubicon button and the truck drives itself through. No fuss, no muss, no need to clutter your brain with knowledge of how to drive off road. Just watch the TV commercials. They show how easy it is for their unmodified SUVs with stock street tyres fully inflated to handle any terrain.
Just turn onto the trail and push the right button. No need to clutter your SUV with messy recovery gear or emergency rations & shelter. Push another button and you talk to a live person who can get you any help you might need.
No need to know how to drive different difficult terrains if you have traction control that has the right icon for the trail you wish to drive through.
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Sorry, but going through the rough trails takes more than the right vehicle. There is no one right vehicle for every trail. What works best for one might have too long or short or too wide or too narrow wheelbase for somewhere else. And it takes knowledge of how to drive a vehicle though obstetrical to get it through without undue damage. And it takes knowledge to know how to fix you vehicle on the trail and to survive if excrement happens.
Just get a vehicle with a reasonably high ground clearance that is big enough to fit family and gear and drive it where you want. Learn the vehicle. Learn how to best get it from point A to point B of the places you like to go without leaving bits of the undercarriage behind.
You may find that you don't want to take your family through Poison Spider or the Rubicon. You may find that your family prefers the scenic national parks and maintained trail travel the best.
You may find that the vehicle has some sort comings for what you need and it is easier to switch marques or models than pour a lot of money into expanding the vehicle parameters. Or maybe just a better set of tyres and on board air will do you.
Forget asking everyone to come up with the perfect family off road SUV for you. No one knows your family needs or preferences. Only you can figure it out. Get something that everyone and everything will fit in and start with the easy trips. Gain experience & knowledge and use that experience to focus in on what works for you. Experience will lead you to the right vehicle for your family needs.
Everyone out there who can offer advice based upon what they need for where they travel. No one but you can know your family's specific needs and preferences. For some people it is a ATV for each person, for others it is a duce and a half with a big luxury apartment on back.
If you want an answer to your question, take your best guess on a vehicle that might fit your needs, go out, gain real life experience and learn what works best for your family and where you end up going.
Expedition style vehicles and serious rock crawlers are very different vehicles and neither might meet your family's needs.
Just get something & do what you want to do. Learn, adapt learn some more and adapt some more. You will only learn from going out there and doing it.
Or I guess you can push the "perfect configuration vehicle for you" button on the instrument panel and have a live voice come on to tell you what you need.
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