Most of the commercial class radios are not "front pannel" programmable. There are a few just hard to find. Others are programmable from a programming cable and a laptop. Some of the Kenwoods have the front panel programming. Try looking for tk-805. You mostly pick the frequencies and tones that you want to use and put those in. You may be able to get your buddies to change to what you have programmed.
Also understand that the "privacy" tones are not really. It will stop the casual listener but if somebody wants to listen they will get the tones in time.