Even if you're big, you might find you like the shorter stock better. They make the shotgun a bit more maneuverable and easier to handle. I'm 6' and long-armed, but I prefer the "children's" length Hogue stock on my 500. As an additional plus, that means it fits the wife perfectly too...
I'd recommend Glock for it's simplicity and low maintenance... but the Rock Island (1911) is a fine gun as well and a good deal. Plus, the RIA is fun to customize.
I know what you mean about idiots that think they are tough stuff because of a firearm. This can happen anywhere... best thing I can say to that (and a policy I follow religiously) is: Out of sight, Out of mind.
A few months ago with a high roller Wall St paycheck, I wouldnt have blinked an eye to buy a glock or several. Given the decrease in paycheck and that the market is killing me and all my clients right now, I have to be smarter with my disposable income hence the RIA.
I was leaning towards a 9mm, but they all just feel so small in my hands. (Palm a basketball no problem, 6"3+, heading towards 225lbs, all upper body strength.)